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The Nagidos Nag, Issue 2
****Special Valentines love-in issue****
***Special WW Preview Edition***
**Special today: Buy one, get one free**
*Special use of lots of red ink special*
Bringing you the Truth through Lies since love began
Never Knowingly Accurate.
Proud to be standing up to truth and honesty. (Still? - Ed)
The Originator of Alternative Facts and False News
****Special Valentines love-in issue****
***Special WW Preview Edition***
**Special today: Buy one, get one free**
*Special use of lots of red ink special*
Bringing you the Truth through Lies since love began
Never Knowingly Accurate.
Proud to be standing up to truth and honesty. (Still? - Ed)
The Originator of Alternative Facts and False News
So in a packed issue this month, we'll take a look at who's planning what for World Wonders, and any love-ins that may interest our reader. Or not. We'll have some special awards to celebrate three months of the server. We'll also gloat that this is the sixth issue of the Nag, a longevity unmatched by any other newspaper. Except Rock's, which also managed six issues, but we won't mention that.
Finally, I'll think of something to fill a bit of space and make it look like a balanced issue.
News of the week isn't really news at all in the sense that Richard Thrust has been predicting it since day 1 of the server, which has earned him significant abuse from certain quarters not far removed from MBCZ, who has been trying unsuccessfully to hide it all that time by rather underhand tricks. This mighty organ wanted to break the news today in a Valentine's scoop, but Party Pooper In Chief Witchunter General just had to let the cat out of the bag yesterday and spoil my fun, for which I will find suitable revenge at some point. Oh, sorry, the news.... yes, it's the renaming of Caustic Soda as Extortion, a name which perhaps better suits them (more later) and a change which was inevitable after MartinusV's cringe-inducing comment "Shake the Soda and the Juice will start to flow in your oceans!". In other news, Extortion and Show Me Your Noobies will be merging to have a go at WWs - although this has been obvious since Day 1, reinforced by two key members swapping alliances fairly early on, it has still caught a fair few members of each alliance by surprise, and not all are happy about it - some to the extent of ghosting. Less happy still are some of the smaller alliances who were being pressurised into supporting one or other of these two behemoths and now are far from clear what the future holds, and less than happy about the way they have been treated. At least that alliance name, Extortion, is honest in this area...
WW Preview
We'll use a Top 12 format to look at the major players and their plans for WWs:
1. Extortion - whatever players end up in this alliance, this is likely to be the one going for WWs
2. Show Me Your Noobies - now Extortion's academy, they will provide cover for Extortion, and eat the small alliances helping them
3. This is not a drill - going for WWs with the addition of some players from Slap.
4. Written in Blood - plan was always to cover Enough is Enough's WW effort, not entirely clear where there path lies now.
5. This is not a hammer - see Drill.
6. Caustic Juice - should we read anything in to them keeping the original name? Probably not.
7. Noobs - fairly likely to have a go, possibly in conjunction with The Langolier Ones.
8. The Langolier Ones - see Noobs.
9. Blood Ties - always intending to have a go as Enough is Enough, they probably realise their chance is gone now.
10. LAST OF THE RIM LORDS - given their
11. The Resurrected - well they're back again, but unlikely to have a major impact on WWs.
12. Slap - it's believed that some of those not joining the tools believe they can make a show of WWs. Er, yeah, right...
Nag Awards
So time for our annual 3-monthly Nag Awards. It being Valentine's Day, naturally our first award is for
Best couple of the server: This was a hard-contested award that could have gone to so many - Witchy and Phil, Witchy and Foo, MBCZ and RT, Shaz and just about anyone, but the award goes to...
MBCZ and Phil. Could ever a couple deserve each other more? Congratulations, love puppies.
Personality of the server, sponsored by Witchunter General. I suspect he sponsored it so he couldn't get nominated.... So many candidates, but only one winner...
For his utterly charming and delightful character, Phil. Well done Phil, richly deserved.
hethinkshessmartandagoodplayerbutnotascleverorgoodashethinksheis Award, sponsored by Phil. Only one nomination here...
Yes, it's Witchunter General.
Yellowbelly of the server: again, several possible nominations, but this award can only possibly go to one recipient, someone who has studiously avoiding helping anyone with his defence when he could sit on it himself, someone who runs into VM the moment the attack alarm sounds, someone who has let all his alliance pals down on every conceivable occurrance...
Who else but DanLWar. Take a bow, Dan, richly deserved.
Deflector of the year - an award for the person who has done the most to twist facts and manipulate them - and people - to try to mean the opposite of the truth. Although many have tried this, it's only those for whom it's second nature who can hope to pick up this award.
Another richly deserved award for May Bee Cra Zee.
Fibber of the server - obviously one of the hardest-fought categories of all, with many people up for it, but in the end, only one choice.
SMYN not going for WWs? No pacts? Yeah, yeah. Well done, Foo Fighter, Fibber of the Server.
Best Looking of the server, sponsored by Richard Thrust.
Richard Thrust. (How did that happen? - Ed)
Most deluded/optimistic of the server - hot favourite for this one was of course Witchy, but I can tell you he hasn't got it.
Anyone who thinks anyone outside the top 4 can win. They probably can't. But rim alliances can certainly have a say in who does win.
The Flop Endowment - sponsored by Magick. Could be awarded for many things, but we'll go with most awful trash talk...
Step up, MartinusV. So awful it was funny.
Newspaperperson of the server. Ah, we like this one!
Congratulations Rock5 for 6 editions of the Nagithos Chronicle. (Er, are you sure? What about us? - Ed)
(Right, that's enough awards - Ed)