Hope

DeletedUser

Guest
Many days I stop
And think to myself
Is all we do a waste?

Is all the efforts we make
To make a better world
Simply an impossible quest?

Is a better place
A world full of grace
Simply too far from reach?

Is it wrong to hope
That people of evil
Can change their ways?

Is there no hope left
For a better future
A future without strife?

But then I think
Perhaps there is a way
For a world that's bliss

Of a world without fears
Rid of danger and mistakes
And things that cause tears

Of a world of love
Full simple harmony
And of many joys

Can people come together
To make such a world
Such a happy place?

Can they put aside
Greed, hate, and ill fate
To design such a wonderful place?

I can hope
I can dream
I can wait.
 
Last edited by a moderator:

DeletedUser8396

Guest
You'll be waiting for quite a while, then :p

I like this. It has a nice flow through most of the piece while not having much rhyme at all (which is a nice change of pace). Only one critique:

But then I think
Perhaps there is a way
For a world that's purely gay
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I'm assuming you are using the word 'gay' here to mean something similar to 'happy'? If so, I'd recommend changing it to a synonym. 'Gay' has been changed in meaning quite a bit where it is rarely, except in jest, used to mean 'happy'.

If you meant it in the modern meaning, then I suppose it can stay :p
 

DeletedUser

Guest
Lol of course I meant happy but I'll see about changing it..
 

DeletedUser

Guest
a pebble said:
Arent you too young for alcohol? What is this 'buzz' you speak of? :p
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*facepalm* That comment did not deserve any response.
 
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