King of the FREAKING Hill

DeletedUser18825

Guest
This forum is too dang quiet. Some nice ol' king of the hill will make things better!

This ain't no normal game of king of the hill. THIS IS KING OF THE FREAKING HILL. You should know how to play. If not, watch and find out.

To play this version, you say My FREAKING Hill instead of My Hill.

Also, please don't ruin it with some lame thing like saying "I kill you and boom, my hill". You must explain how it happened, what you did, and how you set defenses for people trying to steal it.

I'll start:


One day, I was sitting on my porch. I saw a giant mountain in the distance. "I want to climb that freaking thing!" said I. I ran inside my house and gathered the proper supplies: A pen, paper, a stick, and some glue. I stuffed them into a duffel bag and jogged to the mountain. After several hours of intense climbing, I reached the summit. I pulled out the supplies and made a flag. It had -S- on it. I stuck it into the ground, and started dancing with joy. "WHO NEEDS A HOUSE WHEN YOU'VE GOT A HILL!?" I shouted. Then I regretted that, because someone might've heard me. Oh well.
My FREAKING Hill.
 
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DeletedUser27700

Guest
I heard a distant shouting. As I go to explore I see a spyder trying hard to put a flag in a ground. 'Silly Spider', I think, 'you don't have thumbs.'
I grab my trusty Flame Thrower, and walk up the Hill, torching everything insight. As Spyder's charred remains roll down the hill, I kick back, on MY FREAKING HILL.


Mod Note: I will allow 'Freaking' but remember to keep in in context.
 

DeletedUser

Guest
One fine morning, I wake up to the smell of napalm. I go adventuring to find its source. It turns out a giant dragon is bullying a spyder. So I proceed to pull out my bow, sneak up behind the dragon, and shoot him right in the back of the head. he flies away badly wounded.
I walk past spyder's scorched corpse and set up camp on MY FREAKING HILL.
 

DeletedUser18825

Guest
Even with bad burns to my....everywhere, I manage to survive. A wild Leahkim is on the hill, so I act dead. I quietly sneak away at night. I crawl to my house and drink my last bottle of Quick Revive. Then, I grab a whip. I like whips. I run back to the hill, ready to take revenge. I sneak up behind the Leahkim and whip it until it cries and runs away. MY FREAKING HILL.
 

DeletedUser

Guest
After nursing my wounds, I find charon now has control of the hill. I fry him into a nice, yummy piece of bacon.
MY FREAKING HILL.
 

DeletedUser

Guest
As I sat upon my throne in the underworld, I hear the noise of frying, for I have excellent hearing, and decide to investigate. What I find happened to find is a leahkim frying a charon on a hill that looks quite nice and thought I must have this hill. So I summoned a group of skeletal warriors and they injure the leahkim badly. I order the warriors to build a barricade and put the leahkim in it then take up defensive positions around the hill while laying on the hill thinking how nice it was to have my own FREAKING HILL.
 
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DeletedUser

Guest
As I'm laying on the grass of a hill I hear, flames squashing and much more. I turn over on to my stomach and see a battle occuring on top of this hill. I bring myself to my feet, un-sheath my Master Sword and clutch it tight. I unlease my deadly puppy and begin to walk to the top of this war zone. I reach the top of this hill and look around to see this once beautiful place now in ruins...I began to sprint at full speed Puppy at side, Master Sword in my hand. I run squashing a spider, run up a dragons tail to reach it's head, which in moments is gone. While in air I duel a narwhal to a sword fight, easily crushing it in an instant. A Penguin and a man name Charon haven't noticed me quite yet. I sprint to reach the back of Charon, impaling him! I pull out my blade as I see his Lifeless body hit the dirt. I look up to only see the penguin standing. I bend down to my dog and whisper in its ear "It's your turn buddy, go rip him to shreads." I turn around to avoid the sight of my dog destroying this useless bird. My dog returns to me, and just to make my epicness cooler I plant c4 on the ground and walk away. Right as the c4 Blows I yell "MY FREAKING HILL!" and all you can see from a distance is a shadow an explosion and those very words.
 

DeletedUser

Guest
About as soon as had I settled to rest I am ripped apart by this strangely dangerous puppy and thought to myself oh great and slowly start to reform. It takes about several minutes but the owner of the dog is too busy waving what appears to be a toothpick around in the distance to notice. Now fully formed I punt the dog, which conveniently had is back to me, to the side and run full speed into the man with the toothpick, sending him tumbling down the hill and as he' s going down I shout "MY FREAKING HILL go get your own you mere mortal!"
 
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DeletedUser

Guest
as I am swimming around in a badly injured leahkim's belly I transmute into an alien and burst out of his stomach. I emerge reborn with acid for blood to see figure rolling down the hill and a strange flying dog heading for the tree line. So I aim full speed up the hill and stomp the deathly Shadis back to his underworlds throne.

My hill
 

DeletedUser

Guest
As my pup hits the ground a look up to see this strange alien thing i pull my blade from the ground and raise it up In the air. the blade begins to glow blue, "This blade you called a tooth pick, Is the one and only Master Sword! I will avenge you Nibbles!" As my sword becomes completely blue I charge toward this mutated freak, Swing my blade down toward the ground. Sending an huge wave of energy slicing through this mutant. I remove my blade from the ground and lick this almost green blood from it. I slam it into the ground and scream "THIS IS MY FREAKING HILL FOR ME AND NIBBLES ONLY!"
 
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DeletedUser

Guest
Now normally I don't have a temper but these mortals were ticking me off. I spring up in front of the toothpick man with a golf club. using my powers I shrink him to the size of a golf ball. Shouting"FOR" at the top of my non- existent lungs I send him literally flying over the clouds. "MY FREAKING HILL!" I shout.
 
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DeletedUser23516

Guest
Well one day I was sleeping under a tree, when all of a sudden a golfball man hits me in the head. Enraged and slightly drunken, I tract the golfball man's path and swiftly get in my tank I stole in a drunken fit. I see a man holding a golf club, atop a hill, and blast the eff out of him! I don't want the hill, to much work. But its not his FREAKING hill anymore.
 

DeletedUser18825

Guest
After being squashed and burned again, I am laying there. Spiders are quick healers, so it only takes a few days. While the others were battling, I was healing. Watching. I stood up. There was nobody around.... MY FREAKING HILL!
 

DeletedUser

Guest
After reassembling, again, I slowly crept back up the hill. When I got to the top I didn't find anyone only a small spider. Bending down, I picked up the spider and and said, "Well he doesn't look so bad." only to regret it when he bit me. Angered, I flicked it down the hill. Sighing I sat at the top of the hill mumbling, " My FREAKING HILL.."
 

DeletedUser18825

Guest
Funnily, Shadis had picked up some random spider. He didn't know that I was actually a 30 foot tall spider. I sat and watched, as he flicked one of my little friends away. I snuck up behind him and bite him in the neck. I had used my paralyzation venom, so he would be paralyzed for at least a year. I picked him up with one arm and flung him hundreds of yards away. PUNY GOD.

MY FREAKING HILL.
 

DeletedUser23516

Guest
So I got back home, and was just tidying up somethings, when this guy comes crashing through my roof! Well I was already a tad annoyed from the events earlier, so when I found he had landed on my China Cabinet, I blew a fuse. I stormed up that hill, looked that spider in the eye and said, "I am slightly bothered." That seemed to get the message across so I walked back to my house. Have fun with the hill Spyder! I can feed your dog while you defend the hill if you want.
 

DeletedUser

Guest
Little did the spider know that I conveniently didn't have veins to transfer poison or really anything but let him throw me anyways. Crashing through the roof of some man's house I landed on a China Cabinet and watched the owner walk out very angered. Getting up I swore I'd- "Oooh, nice watch there on the table!" I said when I saw it there. I picked up the watch I'm put it in my pocket RIGHT when the guy walked back in. Oh gods was he mad, trying to stab me with a butter knife he had grabbed off his kitchen counter. Flicking it out of his hand, I pushed him aside and stormed out towards the hill. Seeing spider standing there slightly disturbed by possibly that man, I took advantage. I took out a giant hairspray can and sprayed spider with it. He turned to attack only to freeze up. Completely ignoring him I sat down by him thinking MY FREAKING HILL.
 
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DeletedUser

Guest
While you guys squabble over this hill, I've been on a search. I bring my prize back to show you guys: Big Bertha. I shoot you clean off the hill into a conveniently placed punji pit.
I place a blanket on the grass on the hill to cover some burn marks from a certain spyder, and lay down to relax on MY FREAKING HILL.
 
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