Pella Agony Aunt - Week 2!

Sapphire Sorrows

Hello There Pella!

Yes, i did this early. Usually Tuesdays, but i got a little excited with this one - hope you don't mind my dears. We have a few questions to start us off this week, let’s get right into it, shall we?

Dear A.A., I wish to stay anonymous as I have a bit of a problem that's been bugging me for a while and I hope you can help.

When my friends come around I offer them a nice cup of tea, which is all fine and dandy. They even comment on the richness of the blend and how it compliments the biscuits so well (especially when they dunk the biscuits in the tea). Now, here is the root of the problem. My friends pronounce the word "biscuits" as if the U is really spoken like a W, giving the resulting sound of "Biskwits", however being a student of the English language I have tried to educate them that the U is almost silent and in fact the word should be pronounced phonetically as "Biskit". I feel like I’m being picked on by these so-called friends. Please can you help me and tell me who is correct and also if Ginger Snaps are a more civilised choice to "dunk" in tea than bourbon creams.

Yours Thankfully

Dear Anonymous,

Firstly, I wish to complement you on your outstanding hospitality….tea AND biscuits – they should consider themselves lucky! I remember a time when it was one or the other, as people couldn’t afford to offer both.
As for your problems, let’s see if I can help at all. I agree with you completely – I’ll make that clear right off the bat. Now for my point ~> If words were all supposed to sound as they were spelt, it would be a very strange language we speak indeed.
I would like to address your friends, anonymous. We have in our inventory a fun trick called the silent letter. We don’t go around using kanives, we use knives. Shorter people are not ganomes, but gnomes. See in both these examples, the ‘n’ letter is what we put our emphasis on, not the g or k. If this example has not help your pronunciation of the word biscuit, then I’m afraid there is no help for you.
As for your second problem Anonymous, the most civilised biscuit to dunk in one’s hot cup of tea would in fact be a digestive, but in the scenario where you have to choose between a ginger snap and a bourbon cream, then the answer is the bourbon cream – it doesn’t tend to go quite as soggy, and thus lasts longer with less overall mess.

I hope that I have been able to help you in some way,

~Auntie Sapphie


Dear Agony Aunt,

by carefully studying my windmill I have noticed that the wind in Grepolis always blow towards the west. I was wondering if this is a curse of the gods, and why it seems to have no effect on our ships?

Windy Wonders

Dear Windy,

Your very keen eyes have picked up on the workings of the gods, congratulations! In the east there was a king of winds, and he gave a bag of strong wind to Odysseus to aid him on his long journey. A crafty merchant how shall remain unnamed but is very Phoenician found the bag in which the winds were kept and produced them en masse to aid mills across the world of Grepolis! However on the sea, mighty Poseidon would control the winds/weather. You’ll note that every good Greek soldier makes a sacrifice to Poseidon before they set sail. Bless every voyage with a white bull sacrifice and you’ll be winning naval battles left right and centre!

~Auntie Sapphie


Dear A.A.

I can’t talk to strangers but I feel I can talk to you:

The same gang of youths attacked my home, and robbed me 10 times in a week, our C.I.D were quick to respond, and as all the gang wore identical tags, they were easily recognizable and traceable, to a big gang in the area, and known well to them, they assured me they had the matter well in hand.
I received a note yesterday saying " We have apprehended the gang and are in talks with the leader.. a totally nice guy, we suggest a meeting of minds , and we will call in soon to arrange how we should progress.

A little stunned I waited, and sure enough this afternoon , the whole gang were brought into my home, where upon they sat on my sofa, never saying a word, just watching and noting the contents of my living room, whilst the leader held me in a cold stare, without saying a word.

The detective explained to me, that this guy was so strong and powerful, that the very best cause of action, was to move him into my master bedroom, whilst I stayed in the guest room, so he may secure my premise from any future attack, and maybe think about moving into his home, to secure the deal.
He moved in around lunch time, still staunchly silent, until he noticed my sons baseball bat in the corner, pointed at it and in a polished voice said "got any more of them please, I have a gig this afternoon sorry I got no time to chat"

I’m so worried that if I am forced to move, they wont have sky ,HD or a wide screen T.V. And my nights with the discovery channel could be over.
This is a little alarming to me, maybe I'm over reacting, but your wise words, hopefully will bring me to a sound and safe conclusion

Yours sincerely


Dear MJ

This does sound like quite the intriguing situation!
It seems to me as though the diplomacy has saved you some of the cost of replacing those goods taken from your home originally, but I can also understand your fear of being forced to shift here.

What I would suggest is that you talk to a nice big friendly bank and talk about a loan – perhaps 200LS and 700 Slings to clear the debt/animals from the home of the leader of this gang. With the right amount of officials at your back you can overwhelm him with bureaucracy and take the property with loss of current amenities such as the discovery channel. I would suggest you shop around the banks carefully – a few have high interest rates - which include (but are not limited to) lifetime loyalty, exclusive rights to property, monthly tribute or mandatory membership.

Be careful, whatever decision you make,

~Auntie Sapphie

Lovely questions, hope you guys enjoyed them as much as i did! Here's what you've been waiting for:

The 7 Deadly Sin Awards!

Lust ~ The player I most want to be based on their performance in game

Razer has held on to the Teacup this week – if only barely! Ellaranna is showing off some major moves so Razer will have to do something dramatic this coming week to keep me interested ;)

Anger ~ The player who shows the most aggression in game

Maximus024 of The Enlightened has stormed in and taken this cup by just 20 ABP! Congratulations, keep up the good fight! Perhaps Ellaranna will be back for revenge over the next week to reclaim the Teacup but for now it’s all yours!

Sloth ~ the active member of the forum who isn’t so active in game

Zignaught, of Angelic Divinity. Now this could be just to you being new to the game in general, but you’ve been an a few threads in Pella now so should be able to grow a little in game. Feel free to pop some of the more frequent names of the forum a message – we should be able to set you up with a guide or two to help you and your alliance grow J

Covetousness ~ The City I want most based on name and points

1 – Firefly and also 2 – Serenity….both of which belong to Eclipsin12 of the White Eagles. I love me some Sci-Fi, and mourned deeply when firefly was cancelled. I rediscovered my love for the series with the movie, but ranted heavily in places (no, I won’t tell where because I’m not a spoiler.) I recommend that you watch the T.V. series and the movie! Love those city names!

Gluttony~ The Player who takes the most cities in game

I guess Ellaranna can keep this Teacup – there’s not a lot of people taking more than one city! I hope this is only a calming down while people build up their CP for something spectacular next week!

Pride ~ The Best Alliance in Pella (My Opinion)

HaVoC are still top of all the rankings but defenders – and that’s because they have their offence going off atm! Will there be any competition for these fellows, or shall they keep waving th Pride Teacup in all our faces, best of the best!

Envy ~ The Alliance I want to be in based on performance in game

I have to say I was quite surprised by how fast this alliance moved up, and they’ve managed to hold their own to the point where they’ve started breathing on the neck of HaVoC….I am of course talking about The Enlightened, I hope to see much more of them in the future!

That’s all we have for now, please remember to send in those questions – and keep fighting for those TeaCups. Something which Brothers of War have done which I would welcome elsewhere in game is they have advertised A.A. on their alliance forum – one of the questions I’ve answered today came from that thread! So if you feel that I am a little to scary to talk to, or if your alliance as a group would like to submit a question to me, nominate someone to pass along messages from a thread in your forums :p
Also, if you feel the need to give an acceptance speech you are more than welcome to!
Enjoy your day,

~Auntie Sapphie
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Sapphire Sorrows

Thanks :)

I loved these questions, they were loads of fun to read through. I'm glad Pella has such a great sense of humour!


Good job, an enjoyable read as always :D I will leave questions to other people lol.

Sapphire Sorrows

If you say something like that other people might think the same and then i'd get no questions - and we would all suffer for it!

Send in Questions! Do eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet!

Sapphire Sorrows

Feel free to offer any other world problems you can think of too, i don't mind the challenge.

Sapphire Sorrows

Well it wasn't sent in PM, and is specific to a certain race so i guess it is, better edit your post and be nice.

remember it only counts as a proper A.A. question if i get it in my mail box, in game or on the forum.


"My head is egg-shaped so when I try to walk ten miles each morning with a jug of water balanced on top of it, the water spills.. what should I do?"

Or is that racist? :/

Try to bend over with your head straight in front of you about waist high looking at the ground and run into a concrete wall. Maybe that will flatten it.

Sapphire Sorrows

Hey LowKey, think you'd put the word about A.A. in your HaVoC forums?


i read the last weaks 1 from browsing the forums, didnt know when these came out but i have come from the havoc link to read the 2nd one.

Sapphire Sorrows

Thanks for coming to the Agony Aunt guys! :)

And thank you very much LowKey, i appreciate the boost in readership!