Dude, you're not going to sway anyone with this, let alone the right kind of player. Here's a few broad tips:
- Be sure to list what you value as an alliance, your ethos, if you will. Explain what this offers the player and how they can fit into the bigger picture.
- Cover the key details of your alliance - location, recruitment standards, etc.
- Detail your leadership credentials. Have you led before? Have you won a world? How good a player are you? Additionally, think about whether real life vocations or experiences make you a more credible figurehead.
- Format! It's a shallow, sometimes overrated, concept. However, no one wants to read something aesthetically sterile. Split it up with sub-headings, add your in-game coat of arms and perhaps choose a different font or some colour. (Sparingly!) Personally, I think Century Gothic looks exquisite.
Give me a shout if you need anything and good luck!