Newspaper The Amisos Argus

- Seriously What's The Point Nothing's Even Happened Yet Edition

- Being the first instalment of what is probably going to be an incredibly short series of newspapers.

Right, let's get stuck in and address a couple of elephants in the room.

First off, Amisos. I'm sure it's a perfectly normal name for some Greek settlement somewhere or other, but to me it sounds like a guy in a Japanese restaurant after too many flasks of sake trying to order soup for two.

Secondly, it's so goshdarn quiet. Some of this may be down to similar server settings being already available in recently opened Selymbria (EN99 Problems, anyone? No? Suit yourselves). Or perhaps all the 'cool kids' are too busy 'partying on' in the fancy-pants 6/6 conquest server that opened at the same time. However, that's not to say that things won't get a lot more interesting as things progress.

Anyway, alliances. The early front runners for 'Most Hefty Alliance(s) So Far' are definitely Carmichael. I'm sure many of their members, like myself, were surprised to learn that they weren't actually named after the legendary American bandstand leader Hoagy Carmichael. I was looking forward to many a pleasant evening debating which was the better song, "Georgia In My Mind" or "Heart And Soul". Maybe if things got really daring, we could even talk about George Gershwin. Imagine my horror when I discovered that not only was this not going to happen, they were actually talking about things Grepolis-related. It was even suggested that I send out things called 'trips', supposedly so I can tell when a friendly city is being attacked, but I dunno, it just seems like so much effort.

It says a lot about how low-key things have been so far that the second biggest alliance is called Gold Lovers. In fact, it's hard to escape the suspicion that 95 percent of people on this server are in it for the gold. It's a bit like that bit in Monty Python's 'Life of Brian' where the man in charge of the stoning says "Are there any women here?" and lots of people wearing fake beards all say "No! No!" in unconvincingly deep voices.

As for everyone else, "Slap" is a name I recognise from Nagidos. As far as I can recall they chose 'die' when being given a 'merge or die' ultimatum. Definitely best alliance profile picture though.

Others featuring in the top 12 include White Knights, Legion de Honor (eeish, American spelling), and Fight Club. Who I will not talk about for obvious reasons.

That's all for now, I'm off to travel the world, fall in love, marry, sire a family, split up, marry again and carve out a career in my twilight years as an Elvis impersonator in Vegas. By which time my level 15 farm should have just about finished building...

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