DeletedUser46395
Guest
In the (hopefully temporary) absence of more normal news, time for something a little more satirical. Not sure Donald Trump would approve, but who cares...
Backstabbing of the week
Always likely to be a hotly contested category, but a founder being kicked is normally a pretty safe bet.
So this time, we're talking about aliance Adrastos. Poor old merrin11 now has the unwelcome stigma of having not only been kicked from a half-decent alliance, but of being evicted from the alliance he started. Credit, if that's the right word, goes to somebody called mflip234, who I am told has a track record of being a real charmer. Not. Never heard of him/her before myself.
Character of the week
Well there can be only one. Step forward and take a bow Witchunter General. His postings here are often comical in a way he didn't intend, but his in-game diplomacy is something else. We'll settle for just one tiny example here:
"It is time to resolve this once and for all.
I keep telling you that I am one of the greatest players ever.
Time to prove it.
I have recovered from a bad bout of flu (I suppose it was that little bugger RT that told you ?)
Anyway NOT MOVE-NOT MOVING
Take it tomorrow or anytime over the next three days and I quit .
Fail to do so acknowledge my Gold free(ish) greatness and henceforth never refer to legends such as myself as FOOd.
THE ORIGINAL AND BEST RIMLORD WitchunterGeneral "
(One word censored to avoid the Ruler of Disapproval, which I assume is nearly as bad as the Tabard of Shame.)
Can anyone beat that? Round of applause, please.
Pacts of the week
Step forward again, Witchunter General. (Although I'm sure there should be two aiches in there...)
He announced recently that he was pacted with the entire server apart from SMYN and TINAD, but apparently he is now pacted with TINAD too. Excellent work, especially as we didn't even know...
Stuck in the past award
Another one for mflip234, who apparently is under the misapprehension that this is the reincarnation of US server Zaksomethingorother. As if anyone plays US servers... For the record, whoever you are, I didn't, I'm not anyone you know unless you've played EN server, and I'm not alone in that - this is a new server, and we have a new team. Get over it.
Key Wars
The Oracle is reporting some startling wars, so I think they should get a bit of an airing...
Caustic Juice has conquered 66 cities from Caustic Soda and lost 48.
Well clearly Juice have the upper hand in this civil war, and we can expect a fairly imminent reverse takeover.
LORDS OF THE RIM has conquered 9 cities from Death By Chocolate and lost 5.
LOTR are clearly on fire and proceeding nicely with their aim of global domination. Way to go. Whatever that means.
Enough is Enough are proving more than a match against The Resurrected. They ve conquered 18 cities and lost 0.
Another alliance clearly having things go all their own way. One to watch for sure!
Show Me Your Noobies has conquered 15 cities from This is not a hammer and lost 11.
Interesting tight battle here with SMYN slightly ahead - this one could be the battle for the server.
This is not a hammer has conquered 6 cities from Caustic Soda and lost 0.
Or maybe this one is. Especially if you consider this:
This is not a drill are proving more than a match against Caustic Soda. They ve conquered 16 cities and lost 0.
The Tools are absolutely crushing Caustics, bring back Beth, she was right all along.
This is not a drill has conquered 31 cities from This is not a hammer and lost 21.
But what's this? Another civil war? What IS going on on this server?
Made up quotes
In the best traditions of media outlets everywhere, I've made these up for a laugh, to fill space, and to cause consternation. These are true quotes, only the facts have been changed.
"That Witchunter General is a splendid fellow, what?" - Foo
"I do love RT and Bear, marvellous people." - May Bee Cra Zee
"I really can't remember anything about Zak, nor do I care about it" - mflip234
"mflip234 is my best buddy" - merrin11
"I am known for being a very correct, smart , loyal person.I am a top player, that's way i rarely get attacked in every world i play,and my name is synonimous of reliable , teamworking full committed player." - bakita-
(I actually didn't make that one up, but it was said in EN96, albeit about events in Nagidos. By far the least truthful of all these quotes.)
"If you don't shut up, the ruler will be coming out" - Magick. (I suspect this one will actually be said at some point soon. Again.)
"Yes of course you can go and play with people you like, I wouldn't dream of stopping you or threatening you or them." - *Tig*
"You git, Bear" - Richard Thrust. (Another true one.)
And finally
"You weren't supposed to tell Magick." - Forest Fox. (Again true).
So that's all for now, folks, hopefully the proper paper will be back very soon and we won't have to have Issue 6 of this for ages.
Backstabbing of the week
Always likely to be a hotly contested category, but a founder being kicked is normally a pretty safe bet.
So this time, we're talking about aliance Adrastos. Poor old merrin11 now has the unwelcome stigma of having not only been kicked from a half-decent alliance, but of being evicted from the alliance he started. Credit, if that's the right word, goes to somebody called mflip234, who I am told has a track record of being a real charmer. Not. Never heard of him/her before myself.
Character of the week
Well there can be only one. Step forward and take a bow Witchunter General. His postings here are often comical in a way he didn't intend, but his in-game diplomacy is something else. We'll settle for just one tiny example here:
"It is time to resolve this once and for all.
I keep telling you that I am one of the greatest players ever.
Time to prove it.
I have recovered from a bad bout of flu (I suppose it was that little bugger RT that told you ?)
Anyway NOT MOVE-NOT MOVING
Take it tomorrow or anytime over the next three days and I quit .
Fail to do so acknowledge my Gold free(ish) greatness and henceforth never refer to legends such as myself as FOOd.
THE ORIGINAL AND BEST RIMLORD WitchunterGeneral "
(One word censored to avoid the Ruler of Disapproval, which I assume is nearly as bad as the Tabard of Shame.)
Can anyone beat that? Round of applause, please.
Pacts of the week
Step forward again, Witchunter General. (Although I'm sure there should be two aiches in there...)
He announced recently that he was pacted with the entire server apart from SMYN and TINAD, but apparently he is now pacted with TINAD too. Excellent work, especially as we didn't even know...
Stuck in the past award
Another one for mflip234, who apparently is under the misapprehension that this is the reincarnation of US server Zaksomethingorother. As if anyone plays US servers... For the record, whoever you are, I didn't, I'm not anyone you know unless you've played EN server, and I'm not alone in that - this is a new server, and we have a new team. Get over it.
Key Wars
The Oracle is reporting some startling wars, so I think they should get a bit of an airing...
Caustic Juice has conquered 66 cities from Caustic Soda and lost 48.
Well clearly Juice have the upper hand in this civil war, and we can expect a fairly imminent reverse takeover.
LORDS OF THE RIM has conquered 9 cities from Death By Chocolate and lost 5.
LOTR are clearly on fire and proceeding nicely with their aim of global domination. Way to go. Whatever that means.
Enough is Enough are proving more than a match against The Resurrected. They ve conquered 18 cities and lost 0.
Another alliance clearly having things go all their own way. One to watch for sure!
Show Me Your Noobies has conquered 15 cities from This is not a hammer and lost 11.
Interesting tight battle here with SMYN slightly ahead - this one could be the battle for the server.
This is not a hammer has conquered 6 cities from Caustic Soda and lost 0.
Or maybe this one is. Especially if you consider this:
This is not a drill are proving more than a match against Caustic Soda. They ve conquered 16 cities and lost 0.
The Tools are absolutely crushing Caustics, bring back Beth, she was right all along.
This is not a drill has conquered 31 cities from This is not a hammer and lost 21.
But what's this? Another civil war? What IS going on on this server?
Made up quotes
In the best traditions of media outlets everywhere, I've made these up for a laugh, to fill space, and to cause consternation. These are true quotes, only the facts have been changed.
"That Witchunter General is a splendid fellow, what?" - Foo
"I do love RT and Bear, marvellous people." - May Bee Cra Zee
"I really can't remember anything about Zak, nor do I care about it" - mflip234
"mflip234 is my best buddy" - merrin11
"I am known for being a very correct, smart , loyal person.I am a top player, that's way i rarely get attacked in every world i play,and my name is synonimous of reliable , teamworking full committed player." - bakita-
(I actually didn't make that one up, but it was said in EN96, albeit about events in Nagidos. By far the least truthful of all these quotes.
)"If you don't shut up, the ruler will be coming out" - Magick. (I suspect this one will actually be said at some point soon. Again.)
"Yes of course you can go and play with people you like, I wouldn't dream of stopping you or threatening you or them." - *Tig*
"You git, Bear" - Richard Thrust. (Another true one.)
And finally
"You weren't supposed to tell Magick." - Forest Fox. (Again true).
So that's all for now, folks, hopefully the proper paper will be back very soon and we won't have to have Issue 6 of this for ages.
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