Newspaper The Nagidos Nag, Issue the one before the one before last

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Well not all Foo :) I would take him on in Conquest, if I had nothing better to do
Hahaha noz you get your cq group for the next world find wichunter and kill him for me :D, that mofo dont know who hes messing with lmao


The Nagidos Nag, Issue The one before the one before last

Bringing you the Truth through Lies since before time began

Never Knowingly Accurate. Except for the last issue. Which we're really sorry about.

So here we are again. After the debacle of honest reporting that was our previous issue, we'll return to the tried and tested formula of made-up lies, innuendo, euphemisms and double entendres that more honestly reflects the truth of the server and hopefully leaves everyone wishing I had never been born as they splutter over their keyboards, and gives me the chance to drink deeply at the well of narcissism and self-congratulation whilst ignoring the brave exploits of alliances heroically picking on those with personal issues.

This year's edition will focus on

Famous Feuds, Forgotten Fights, Feeble Foes, Fairweather Friends and Fantastic Fornication
All the things that make this game so popular. Although there is a chance that at least one of those categories won't be fully represented, unless we look at self-love. Which might be a good idea...

Alkandross. Mr Dross is the Chief Narcissist of The Narcissistic Ones, an alliance so desperate to be recognised as superhuman for beating a group of teenagers with severe personal issues that he can't resist blowing his own trumpet at every opportunity. {Is that a euphemism or a double entendre? - Ed}. Mr Dross also suffers from amnesia, which sounds like is should be some form of milky pudding. {Are you likening him to a rice pudding, or hinting that he couldn't pull the skin off one? - Ed} He's certainly forgotten Lapithos, and one or two servers that this esteemed reporter has also misplaced in time and memory, so we might have to make some allowances there.
File under "Feeble Foes" and "Fantastic Fornication". {Are you trying to say he's a shameless self-lover in every sense of the phrase? - Ed}

The Narcisistic Ones v Death By Chocolate. Nobody cares.
File under "Forgotten Fights", 'cos we've already forgotten it.

Shaz Boodoo v Just about everyone. Shaz appears to be very loyal, but somewhat of a simmer. No great shame in either of those, but they do make his bellicose outbursts more than a little amusing. As a result, he's become somewhat of a figure of fun for many in the forums. To his credit, Shaz has rather learned to play along with this, which shows hidden depth of character and a certain grudging admiration from this reporter - which would never be admitted to in public.
File under "Famous Feuds"

philvgr81 v Witchunter General. One of the jewels of this server's rivalries pits two pantomime villains against each other. In the red corner, we have Phil, famous for being utterly incomprehensible, and in the blue corner, we have Witchy, famous for being utterly incomprehensible. Their verbal jousts are a huge clash of styles that generally leave the onlooker utterly bemused that two people can say so much that is such total gibberish.
This rivalry has its roots in the fact that Witchy considers Phil to be a brainless thug, and Phil considers Witchy to be stone cold crazy. The Nag reserves judgement on both counts. Certainly highly amusing if you can decipher what either of them says.
File under "Famous Feuds"

Last of the Rim Lords v Show Me Your Noobies. Basically an extension of Witchy and Phil's personal animosity, this fight is there because Witchy thinks SMYN are just picking on the little guy, and SMYN in return are more than happy to pick on the little guy that is Witchy's alliance. Which kind of makes both sides losers..
File under "Forgotten Fights" I suppose...

Bearissimus v Spongebath. Not one of the classics, but it amuses me. Spongey won't talk to Bear because Bear told a few home truths. Spongey is not exactly renowned for being the most diplomatic diplo, as many on the server will attest to, but apparently most aren't stupid enough to say it to his face - they quite happily talk about arrogance behind his back, though. Well Spongey spotted that several Drill members had high DBP, and decided to threaten Drill that if they were defending Bloods, there would be consequences. Drill's response was that yes, several players had high DBP, but that that was because SMYN were actually attacking Drill members. Spongey being Spongey didn't have the good grace to apologise for his aggressive behaviour, displaying that very arrogance so many have commented on, and Bear being Bear couldn't help but point that out and also point out the fact that it might have been smarter to actually check out some facts before issuing threats. Spongey flounced off in a huff, and that was that.
File under "Fearweather Fiends" because that category is looking lonely...

Richard Thrust v May Bee Cra Zee. This one is a classic, though. Beth dislikes RT because she thinks he's a manipulative, controlling liar. RT dislikes Beth because he thinks she's a paranoid manipulative, controlling liar. One of these people is exactly what the other accuses them of, but this reporter is not going to let on which one that May Bee.
File under "Famous Feuds".

DanLWar. Dan has acquired a reputation over the years for talking a good fight, but always looking after No 1. We've lost count of the number of alliances he's abandoned to their fate whilst trying to pursue yet another crown by jumping ship - all the time ensuring his own cities' safety by never allowing his extensive bireme fleets to leave home waters.
File under "Feeble Foes"? "Fantastic Fornication"? You choose.

Show Me Your Noobies v Blood Ties. I suppose the server's most prestigious war, this one is basically a continuation of SMYN v EiE. A strategic war, part of the battle for control of O54, and so far too interesting and strategic to get much coverage here.
File under "Forgotten Fights" because

Last of the Rim Lords v Caustic Soda. Witchy thinks this lot are even worse than Noobies as flat track bullies. They're proving him right by thrashing him.
File under "Forgotten Fights"

This is not a Drill v Pandemonium. Ah, the Pandas. Everybody's favourite cute and cuddly alliance, This is not a Drill are Hammering the rather less popular Pandas. At least they fight back, even if the result of their recent op was about as successful as you might expect from an onslaught of cuddly teddy bears, taking a grand total of nil cities, which advances their overall take against Drill/Hammer to - nil.
File under "Feeble Foes"

Last of the Rim Lords v Thor. Just to clear up one outstanding issue from the last, er, issue, those players expelled from WitchyRim mostly ended up in Thor. Who are comfortably ahead in this war.
Single file.

Caustic Soda v Mad Dogs. All you need to know about this one is how one-sided it is. In fact you probably don't even need to know that. This is not the decisive battle for the server.
Don't bother filing

Slap v Rapid Growth. Well one of these alliances is very badly named indeed...
File under "Forgotten Fights"

The Resurrected v The Reborn. Surely this is a third-rate Zombie film? Almost certainly not as good as
Cockneys v Zombies
, which at least had the advantage of having some people I have heard of in...
File under the coffee maker.

Winged Hussars v TangoWorldWide. Unusually for the Nag, I'm not making this up, these are genuine alliancies. I neither know nor care any more about either.
File your nails rather than this one.

The Narcissistic Ones v Magical Moments. We've reached the area where delicate blossoms are to be found, it all sounds very camp.
File for bankruptcy.

Manowarriors v The Twentytwo. Who inevitably have 23. But now it's sounding homoerotic.
File the bars of your cell window.

mauro the conqueror II v djdom32. This one is quite amusing. mauro has turtled up to protect against Mad Dogs, and is sending noob-style attacks against djdom. As a result, djdom has a fairly low opinion of mauro, and suggests that without lots of gold, mauro would likely not be very near the top of the leaderboard. Hard to disagree on the evidence presented.
File under "Famous Feuds", and mauro under "Feeble Foes".

So that's all we've got time for this month, tune in next week for tomorrow's edition.

And remember, if your favourite/least favourite player/alliance/whatever hasn't/has been featured here favourably/unfavourably, don't complain to me unless you want the same treatment yourself.
THe 4 expelled members > 1 went to SMYN.. > 3 to Sicilians. There were only 4 expulsions. , You could have checked this with me.

No member that I am aware of went to THOR. Unlike most Alliances if a player wants to leave he or she leaves - it would only be in the most exceptional circumstances that leaving LOTR would trigger recriminations.

Why don't you just do the simple thing and ask? I suppose the truth is not newsworthy in the moral cesspit that is Nagidos External Forum.


Hahaha noz you get your cq group for the next world find wichunter and kill him for me :D, that mofo dont know who hes messing with lmao

I have been rimmed once. The first world I ever played within 2 weeks by a teammate when I had gone all out attack to clear a target city for him he slipped into mine instead. After that I restarted in the Rim and we won that world.

I have never been close to being rimmed ever since.

That guy has beaten 9 out of 10 with one draw over the years. I am glad you realise it is a job you could not do yourself. The first glimmering signs of wisdom.
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