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The Nagidos Nag, Issue Special Victory Souvenir Edition Issue
****Special Victory issue****
***Special souvenir Edition***
**Special needs journalism**
Bringing you the Truth through Lies since whenever I started
Never Knowingly Accurate.
Proud to be standing up to truth and honesty. (I get it - Ed)
The Originator of Alternative Facts and False and Fake News
SO congratulations to This Is Not An Extortion for winning Nagidos in what is probably a record time, and certainly the fastest under the new anti-rotation rules. We sent our roving reporter out to ask key players for their thoughts, but as ever he went down the pub and made it all up. And as ever, we will publish it and pretend it's real.****Special Victory issue****
***Special souvenir Edition***
**Special needs journalism**
Bringing you the Truth through Lies since whenever I started
Never Knowingly Accurate.
Proud to be standing up to truth and honesty. (I get it - Ed)
The Originator of Alternative Facts and False and Fake News
Obviously, TINAE, TINAD and Extortion players are pretty pleased at securing victory so quickly, but others are less impressed. We spoke first to an orphaned piece of sports footwear:
NN: What are your feelings on the TINAE victory?
Skiboot: What have they got to be proud of? They didn't fight anybody, and their opposition was the worst ever assembled in the game.
NN: Er, but you WERE their opposition...
Skiboot: EXACTLY! Have you ever seen worse?
NN: But you had a bash at all 7 wonders, didn't you?
Skiboot: Yeah, but they unsportingly took cities on 5 of our wonder islands very quickly which made a mockery of our efforts.
NN: I thought you said they didn't fight anybody?
Skiboot: I meant they didn't fight anybody good.
NN: So their victory is meaningless because you're so bad?
Skiboot: EXACTLY! AND they merged!
NN: Didn't you try to merge with Extortion?
Skiboot: Well yes, but that was different.
NN: How?
Skiboot: We screwed it up.
NN: And didn't you merge with Blood Ties?
Skiboot: Well yes, but that was different as well.
NN: How?
Skiboot: We didn't win.
We then tried to interview several players from SMYN, but they had all run away, but we found donpj111 instead:
NN: And what do you think of the victory?
donpj111: Disgraceful, they should be ashamed of themselves.
NN: And why is that?
donpj111: Well how dare they play to win, it's just not right. Disgusting.
NN: Could you explain, please?
donppj111: Well that TINAD, they didn't fight anybody all game.
NN: You do know that they're actually involved in the longest and biggest war of the whole server, taking 675 cities from an enemy formerly in the top 12?
donpj111: Look, don't bring facts into this, I want to hate them for being smarter and better than me, so I will.
So we thought we would talk to DanLWar:
NN: What d...
DanLWar: Don't ask me about that lot, I hate them so very much.
NN: Whay's that?
DanLWar: They destroyed my Top 12 alliance, pushed me way out towards the rim, then knocked the stuffing out of my new top 12 alliance by taking over 600 cities and totally wrecking our chances of building WWs.
NN: But they haven't fought anybody all game, we're told?
DanLWar: Are you mad?
So we thought we would talk to somebody on the other side.
NN: So easy win, then, and you didn't have to do any fighting all server.
Bearissimus: Not that easy, no. And we have done some fighting...
NN: Why do you say it wasn't easy? You merged with your biggest rival, and won in record time despite the new rules.
Bear: Didn't all go to plan. Sure, we consolidated our home oceans fairly early on with some aggressive play, but our plans were skewered a bit when the alliance we were working with decided they didn't want to merge in to us after all.
NN: Who was that?
Bear: Slap. Most of them went hostile, so we had to eliminate them, which was not the plan.
NN: Apart from that, though, it was pretty smooth?
Bear: Yeah. We found that most of the big guys didn't want to fight us as TINAD, and to be honest when we started fighting SMYN we had to stop fairly quickly because we were afraid we would wipe them out. When they asked us to stop, we did. Their WW performance didn't come as much of a surprise.
NN: So why the merge, then?
Bear: We were very confident that our plan could deliver us 4 WWs and thus the game. Very confident indeed. We were far less confident we could do all 7, and we had players who we wanted to get a secondary crown for. Seemed like a no-brainer.
NN: But cowardly, no?
Bear: Don't see how. We played to win, we won, we fought battles on the way, some of which we're still fighting. Unlike some alliances, who just seem to have run away...
NN: So are there opponents you respect, then?
Bear: The Blood Ties/EE guys - they played it straight and without bitterness. Good bunch. And the Timber Wolves - excellent effort at WWs. Of the non-WW alliances, Bloods have been completely straight-up.
NN: Isn't this all rather self-indulgent?
Bear: Isn't that the advantage of writing the paper when you're won?
So there we have it. Clearly a satisfying result for the winners, and rather less so for the losers.
On that bombshell of in-depth insight, we'll sign off.
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