-=| THE PSEIRA CHRONICLE |=-
Dear Lady Hoplite and Gentleman Hoplites, It is I Trist3, your favorite (and only) reporter still right out of O55 getting you the best Greek news in our second edition of what we are now going to call = THE PSEIRA CHRONICLE =. For those who missed our first edition, we essentially take the best and spiciest idiots on the server and serve them up nicely roasted and exposed for you all to salivate over. Today on the menu we will be reviewing our dearest Captain Bromentum (wait that’s not his name? oh well run with it), taking a lead role in his new saga, Pirates of the Agean (featuring the East Nemesis Trade Company). Lets Begin
= Chapter 1, The Curse of the Black Charter =
Our protagonist begins this clumsy adventure by signing the cursed (and late may I add as the charter was drafter a week and a half into the war…) Charter of the Check Mate holy war (a copy will be provided bellow, edited with every infraction of our protagonist). Directly the captain is confronted with a challenge – Teamwork. Indeed, the esteemed Bromemtum had only ever had to worry about himself before and the prospect of self-sacrifice for a greater cause was something he was alien too, and a simple word document was not about to change that.
The first blunder however would not come from the typed menace, but from an agreement with current partner in crimes Stooge. Indeed Cap’n Bro’m had agreed for the Stooges to take all 55 Dunster city (a player who was previously in SS, the alliance where stooge is from and had only been in The East Nemesis Trade Company for 5 days before VMing for 51). However, when the day of his exit came, he found himself in need of more cities, and thus decided to confront the stooges in taking the Dunster cities. He obviously denied the existence of such agreement, only to be confronted by lady Mercenary Swann on his lies on the subject, swaying his heart into acknowledgment. Despite that the Cap’n would fight on for the cities, sadly losing this battle 19 cities to 0 in 55, even with his LTS DLU in the few remaining low moral cities. But he had not yet lost the war.
Indeed, the latest hole in his ship, wait no in his team left by this blunder had put Bromentum in a predicament, where would he go find the wood, wait no players, to fill the empty slots. He looked left, but only kleos, and looked right, and there he found the perfect team to recruit from, battle-hardened, and with loads of slots, CHECK MATE! Wait what? Isn’t he fighting checkmate? Well no, but YES, but not really. You see the dankest of Bros is only in it for himself, taking CM cities when he can, but also their players when he needs. Unfortunately, his attempts were thwarted by a new concept he was not ready for, loyalty, and this newest mistake would come back to his disappointed allies which would not take this transgression of the cursed charter lightly…
= Chapter 2, Dead Man's Text =
Fortunately for our great plunderer of the sea, he would soon strike gold in his next voyage. If he could not recruit new players, he would try to guarantee others would lose players to equal it out. A fortunate turn of event had left Oubay allianceless and showing inactive for over a day. Cap’n Bro’m assuming this was a stooge internal, decides (and of course in very good faith) to secretly take his crew out to steal some of those nicely built cities belonging again to his ally.
Sadly for him, the Flying Oubman was not about to sink quite yet, and his attacks were not only spotted 1 hour after he left the team but also relayed to his allies, which further increased the dismay between the crews. Should this be considered another breach of their agreement? Fortunately, the situation seemed to pass without trouble, a close call but no losses for the captain, yet.
However, throughout his voyages across the Aegean, the great Bro would send numerous messages in a bottle to the enemy of the coalition (DRAMA ALLERT), intel provided to him by yours truly William Trist3 to the highest council of the coalition. Ofcourse honourless Bromentum would feed this information right back to the enemy of the coalition, and help him track down William’s informant. (Cheers to move for providing the remnants of the bottles, and for the exceptional reaction, even if your intentions are likely not to help out the CHRONICLE )
Quick interlude here from the editor. At this point, we’re very unsure who’s side MomentumZH was truly on. There was enough evidence to suggest he was working with each party equally as much, as thus considering him part of the coalition is not truthful, nor is it to consider him a part of CM. We are putting him in some sort of grey zone where he manages to betray both sides on the daily, a feat even we are surprised is possible.
= Chapter 3, At IRGU’s End =
The Cap’n strikes gold! A stray Check Mate member by the name of IRGR8RU had left VM under strange circumstances early and alone. A golden Galion full of treasure for our protagonist to plunder. He instantly sails after his treasure, but the Cap’n is also cunning. He parks birs in multiple IRG cities to stop his allies from getting the cities (whaaaaaa). He in fact send a message to his closest allies, the kleos to inform them of this, but unfortunately, this message in the bottle catches the wrong current, and ends up in the MAIN CHANNEL OF THE COALITION DISCORD. Indeed now everyone could see it for a few minutes before the Cap’n quickly took aim with his broadside and blasted the message into oblivion (but not before William was able to see and memorize the message ).
Furthermore, the smartest of all Captains on the server decides to take 2 of IRGs 55 cities (another breach of their argument), setting William in an uncontrollable fury of yet another breach of the agreement. This time he would not let it pass. William Trist3 thus gathered both Captain Bromentum and his dearest Lady Mercenary Swann and demanded an explanation for this lack of enforcement. Although Miss Swann originally threw a bit of a tantrum for havin’ been dragged out of bed for this idiocy, she eventually comes around and agrees to side with Will on this one, leaving Jack, wait not Bro’m to fend for himself. He begins concocting the perfect political answer to get out of this and spin it into a win for him, and after a whole day of thinking comes up with this
(Umm wait is he just agreeing to his guilt? Or is this some reverse psychology technique??? Editor very confused) Indeed the momentum just admits he was in no way trying to hold up what he swore to do! What an incredible show of disloyalty, something that the great coalition would no longer accept, and things would never be the same…