The wrath of Augustus! Co-operative story!

[DeletedUser28456]

My dad was killed was killed by the evil one a warrior of Hades! I've come to avenge that is my place on this palnet, that is my job!

Continuation fromThe hanging of a loved one!

Aboard the Ionian star, with Jason and Parker and Lily! We saw a ship near us, with no crew no people!
The Captain Wolo set up a search party and we went across, the deck was stone cold, and then a raven swooped, it was followed by a deafining scream, a man, with to bronze daggers in each eye! Then there was a noiuse to my left and there was an army of skeletons the battle had started!

In the middle of the battle the ship shook, I fell over to the side and there, below the ship, it was a beast, it was a hydra!


Please continue and I'll continue tommorow!

 

[DeletedUser]

One thing. If you want to write stories and not sound like a todler high on acid, don't use exclamation marks. In fact, this writing makes you sound like an effeminate penguin.

 

[DeletedUser8396]

Hypate, you are really just a hater on everything, arent you...

As he said, but in a nicer way: Try using less exclamation marks. It detracts from the story because it forces the reader to put a lot of emotion in each sentence, when some sentences are supposed to be highlighted by emotion.

Not a bad story, wish it was a bit longer. Please continue writing.

 

[DeletedUser28456]

thanks

thanks guys but this is a co-operative story so please evryone!

 

[DeletedUser28456]

C'mon people, its a co-operative story so you have to post too!!

 

[DeletedUser]

You have way to many exlomation marks.

 

[DeletedUser28456]

Yeah I've just logged back into this, I was so immature 3 years ago :Angry:

 

[DeletedUser]

continuation...

I woke in the morning to find that I had a nightmare and as I stepped off the Caledonian MacBrayne ferry with my spear in one hand a can IRN-BRU in the other. I said to me Da. " Ha' ye goat any more canz of this paint strippa? Its magic Aye. I dream't that we were attacked by a gang of Rangers supporters singing "He's fat! He's round! He bounces on the ground! Tommy Doc, Tommy Doc..."

 

[DeletedUser]

Yeah I've just logged back into this, I was so immature 3 years ago :Angry:

As far as I can tell, you keep thinking this throughout your whole life, and I have only just finished my second decade alive.