DNN Movie review

DeletedUser

Guest
Needless to say, I was forced to watch "Dungeons and Dragons" last night because my gigantic Daft-filled gut was interfering with my ability to fight gravity and track down the remote control. I had heard rumors about how terribly poor "Dungeons and Dragons" was, but I merely dismissed them with a flip of the hand. The movie inspired me to play a game of DnD at a buddies house
Then the following happened:
DUNGEON MASTER: "You're in a room. There is a door. The room is moist."
ME: "I want to open the door."
DUNGEON MASTER: (Rolls dice) "You can't open the door. You're a Daft and your daft saving throw versus door opening failed." (Rolls dice) "Also, you took 2 damage points."
ME: "Wait, damage from what? Nevermind, I want to throw my flask of flaming oil and burn down the door."
DUNGEON MASTER: (Rolls dice) "You throw it but miss the door because you're an Daft and you can't throw." (Rolls dice) "The oil burns you for 18 damage."
ME: "Fine, I want to cast a 'Open Door' spell."
DUNGEON MASTER: (Rolls dice) "You screw up the spell and instead end up casting 'Open Sore.' The BSP behind you suddenly shouts while BSP goo drips out of his STD." (Rolls dice) "You take 9 damage points."
ME: "Huh? From what? Okay, whatever, I want to give the BSP
all my gold in exchange for him opening the door."
DUNGEON MASTER: (Rolls dice) "He accepts your proposal and opens the door for you."
ME: "Great, finally I didn't get hurt by-"
DUNGEON MASTER: (Rolls dice) "You get hit in the face by the door for 12 damage points."
ME: "dammit."
DUNGEON MASTER: (Rolls dice) "Inside the room is a set of chainlinked iron coif shell plate scale power armor."
ME: "I want to wear the armor!"
DUNGEON MASTER: "You can't because you're a monkey and the only things monkies can wear are those sissy green folded hats and a light cotton blend shirt that attracts enemy projectiles."
ME: "Wait, you never told me that-"
DUNGEON MASTER: (Rolls dice) "You suffer 21 damage points of sheer embarrassment for failing to put on the armor in front of the BSP. You have died."
ME: "Hold on a second here-"
DUNGEON MASTER: (Rolls dice) "Your corpse takes 15 damage points."
Speachless I get up and Return home to my beer and my couch.(SW)
 

DeletedUser

Guest
Please expand on this if you have had anything like this happen to you...
Two daft commanders were walking through the woods and they came to some tracks.

The first Daft said: "These look like deer tracks."

And the other one said: "No they look like moose tracks."

They argued and argued for a while and they were still arguing when the train hit them.
 

DeletedUser11891

Guest
haha.. never played Dungeons and Dragons but that's the funniest thing I've read in ages! You're very talented.
 

DeletedUser

Guest
Lol just saw this now! Hilarious, some of your best work! +rep !
 

DeletedUser11468

Guest
RAIDERS!!! I thought you told me you would be quiet about our arguement that one day. The embarrasement you have caused us.


wg3246 said:
Please expand on this if you have had anything like this happen to you...
Two daft commanders were walking through the woods and they came to some tracks.

The first Daft said: "These look like deer tracks."

And the other one said: "No they look like moose tracks."

They argued and argued for a while and they were still arguing when the train hit them.
Click to expand...
 

DeletedUser11468

Guest
Movie Critique for "DAFT the true story".

I find this movie quiet impressive in the entertainment area but the character development needs work.

The special effects for dinobites was over the top and amazing. He was larger than life litterally.

raiders. I am not sure. the actor made him come out as much smarter than he really is. Seriously, he was never a womanizer adding those numerous love scenes are inaccurate. He can't even find his left hand on certain days.

Mad-Rappa. That was underdeveloped. He was not as boring as portrayed in the movie. You'll know what I mean when you meet mad.

Amorelus. I do not drown puppies and kitties. The director should have used the book written by amorelus not by raiders.

jjalsmelton was never mad-rappa's secret lover. That's propaganda by Elvis. They'll say anything to get attention away from them.
 
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