'Feminists and the Right to be Ugly' Recast

[Lugosi]

Feminists and the Right to be Ugly
Jill Tweedie, 2 February 1970, Guardian (Page 284, Cupcakes and Kalashnikovs)
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(Something I thought I would share.)

The point of a recast is to capture the ideas and emotions of the original writer almost as if you were carrying on their piece. For the exam we are asked to do a recast of 300-400 words and then do a commentary on what we have written. The following was done for a presentation which I presented today on this particular article from the Sex and Body Image section of Cupcakes and Kalashnikovs. We had to create our own brief for the recast as well.

Proposed Recast Scenario
Imagine you have read this article in the Guardian and you have been inspired to reply to Ms Tweedie concerning her views and to what extent you agree with them following your own life experiences specifically relating to your own vanity.

Response
Dear Ms Tweedie,

An upbringing off the mainland on the Isle of Bute is perhaps one of the most accepting communities to grow into; a community which is very unlikely to knock the tender petals of vanity from a fellow young islander. The majority of boys kicked stones along the cobbled single track roads. I just assumed they were too nervous to meet my gaze. I did get the occasional tipped hat from the butcher at the bottom of the hill. Maturity that must have been the deciding factor or at least that is what I use to riddle over in my head.
Similarly my exceedingly silent Scottish father did manage a nod in my direction once I was ready at the door to go out. I took it as a motion of approval rather than an incentive to open the front door. This early psychological dilemma in my childhood seemed to go entirely unnoticed, I arrived at adulthood no worse off than the next dame.
My physical appearance is no shame of mine. I engage in simple make-up; whatever fashionable clothes fill the shops and a rather contemporary hairstyle passed down the family. I am secure. A life of scouring designer boutiques and depleting the ozone layer with cans and cans of hairspray is not something I profoundly oppose. I could have gone either way on this junction of vanity and still could. It was my choice rather than a display of militant protest.
Although I deem myself to have balanced the gap between aesthetic dilapidation and devastation I still don’t seem to have avoided the peacocking role. The majority of men now seem just as set upon dominating their sex as their impeccable female counterparts. Usual logic suggests the chasm between the two genders is one of opinion rather than fact which has been unbeknown to us both.

Kind Regards,

Jackie.

Commentary
Throughout the extract personal pronouns are used. “I” and “they” address the audience more directly which in this case creates a more challenging tone and prompts the audience to converge their own personal thoughts.
Emotive language is used to convey the writers feelings towards women from society. The emotions of “Vanity” and “Humiliation” are significant because vanity shows the preconditioned pressure on women whilst humiliation demonstrates to the audience one of the many psychological impacts of the pressure put on women concerning appearance but more significantly humiliations devastating effect on women's self esteem.
Also featuring throughout the extract is the subtle use of humour “depleting the ozone layer with cans and cans of hairspray is not something I profoundly oppose.” The idea of a woman who is not particularly tied towards vanity not opposing this very offensive trait is very contrasting. This makes it quite funny because someone who should deeply oppose something is sweeping it aside almost jabbing fun at it.
The author uses the abstract noun “Maturity” to present the idea to the audience that there is some emotional change between childhood and adulthood in men which transforms them from solitary savages to approachable acquaintances. It is significant because it seems to trouble the writer because they can see no apparent reason for it.
At the beginning of the second paragraph the rule of three is used to evoke her feelings towards their father “Similarly my exceedingly silent Scottish father.” This is powerful because it is concise and emphasises her emotions to the audience semantically.
In addition the author uses simple sentences to transmit certain truths. “I am secure” is a symbolic point within the extract because it demonstrates that not conforming to the social pressures of vanity has not made her come a cropper within society concerning her function as a female. The one clause sentence in this case is very piercing which intensifies the ideas and message the author is trying to get across.