Newspaper The LegendZ Take Issue 1

SlivasLegendZ

Phrourach
The LegendZ Take
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Welcome to the 1st Edition of the LegendZ Take. In this satirical newspaper, I will take you on a sarcastic and insulting journey through the world of Epidamnos. Hopefully, I will reveal some interesting facts along the way, but mostly we shall see who has the thickest skin and the best sense of humour.
DISCLAIMER: I mean no offence to any alliances or players and am writing this only for a good read once in a while. If you hate it, tell me and I won’t come back!
SECOND DISCLAIMER: I do not consider myself a legend.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Paper consists of the following sections and will probably be altered from edition to edition depending upon the response of the crowd:
1. The World Rankings
2. The World Wars
3. The Interviews
4. The Reports
5. The Educational Section
I felt it only necessary that we educated ourselves a little in each edition about a bit of Greek mythology, almost like Suzie Dent’s “Origins of Words” on Countdown (If you are from the UK you know).

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


1. The World Rankings
Let’s be honest, we can see the world rankings. If you have got this far to the externals you most certainly know of the sites that show you the rankings and if not, well…

So instead, I am going to tell you the real-world rankings and see who bites first.

1. Jinsl001 Souls – It is a common misconception that Twisted Souls are the no.1 rated alliance in this world. Twisted are actually an academy to Jinsl001, who is single handily the no.1 alliance in this world. He kills who he likes and is happy to carry 59 other players on his back (what a kind guy). Twisted have been making good progress is taking cities from strong opponents, solidifying their core. They are, however, the most stretched alliance in the top 5 and this could be an issue facing wars on multiple fronts.

2. True Snakes – Now hold on a second one would say, this is not the name of an alliance… Well no not exactly. Despite no announcement from the two alliances on their profiles, True Fear and White Snake are currently the same functioning body. Indeed, upon conquering a TF city, most of the support arriving still was from WS. I am yet to be told who is who’s whipping boy, but I am optimistic that there is indeed one. Now I went with True Snakes, but I feel a much better merger name would be “White with Fear”. Now, the leadership may take the great name, but I have it copyrighted and it will come at a price…

3. The Priory - … Ah to risk being kicked all for the sake of a few laughs. Who would do such a thing? Yes, me. Being part of the Priory is rather fun, I have a wonderful time in fact. What does annoy me slightly is the necessity to pray to our lord Miniboo at least 3 times a day. This would be fine in itself, but unfortunately, we only have one church to attend between us. This is not ideal when you get stuck behind jruotolo24, who has awful wind. Despite this, the Priory holds the official 2nd position in the world for points and the 1st position for methane production. They have a solid group of players who are very familiar with one another, which always helps when times get tough. The recent return of their kind defender arcane70 further increases the stability of the alliance.

4. The Shady Bunch – Now the question we must ask about these guys is just how Shady it really is down in 4th spot in the REAL rankings. I suppose they must have the lowest rate of skin cancer among the alliances aforementioned. That is the main solace they can take and who is to say that is not a good one? The Shady Bunch have a very strong core (Kuini’s “get fit in 30” programme must be a winner).

They are used to fighting on multiple fronts and I must say I much preferred their profile when the link to diplomacy sent me to a non-existent player. Got me at least 5 times that one did! With no one to worry them to the north, they have the bonus of being able to focus on a single front. This could be key in the upcoming wars with Twisted Souls and The Priory.

5. Kraken –

Let me know. I cannot pretend to know the leadership of Kraken, yet I presume further down the road I will get to. Having only interviewed the official top 5 this week do not be offended when I offend you (wait…). The only thing I can find to rank these guys is the quality of their joining criteria. Which is, as I understand, to recruit only people who are kidding about beating them. I considered applying but found myself unable to make funny jokes about how I would take down Kraken. I, therefore, did not bother.

I will be interested to see if next week any alliance can catch Jinsl001, and if anyone can find a medical remedy for Jrutolo24’s awful wind (like please if there are any ancient doctors out here please PM me). Until then, let’s move on to the wars.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


2. The Wars
1. Twisted Souls vs The Tipplers – According to grepolife at the time of writing this the conquests stand at 53 – 0. This led me promptly to examine the definition of war… I found synonyms such as “conflict”, “fighting” and “struggle”. I, therefore, had to do some more digging and found this instead: Obliteration – To mean total destruction. That’s better. This war was so ferocious that the Tipplers now no longer exist.

2. The Priory and Twisted Souls vs The Shady Bunch – The shadies have met both of these alliances head on. The Priory has been moving west but continues to receive small raids from the shadies. Twisted Souls have been fighting more intensely. Despite being outnumbered the shadies are holding their own with the official score 15-8 at the time of writing this in favour of The Priory and Twisted.

3. True Fear and White Snake vs BENNU CULT – 44-0 see no.1 definition of Obliteration.


4. Twisted Souls vs True Fear and White Snake - A more recent war following the dissolution of the pact between these alliances there has been quite an epic war between these alliances. Despite the battlefields being only young the score currently stands at 8 - 3 in favour of Twisted Souls. It will be interesting to see how Twisted deal with assaults on both fronts from worthy opponents.

It is good to see the top alliances going at each other early on. Diplomacy is always a key component of the wars and who wins. We will see in the weeks to come who has the most stable leadership and who will crumble as the pressure ramps up.

Seeing as this edition is focusing on the top 5 alliances I will leave it at that for now.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

SlivasLegendZ

Phrourach
3. The Interviews
princess Kuini – The first respondent to my mail about a satirical newspaper, the queen of shade, did not disappoint… Instantly casting me into the dirt. When asked if she would be willing to do an interview she responded “lol, why would I?”. I suspect she knew the first question of the interview was going to be “on a scale of 1 to 10, how much does the lack of capitalisation of ‘princess’ in your name annoy you?” For me, I’d score it a high 8, which considering I am not even the bearer of such a burden, is indicative of how much sleep she must lose over it. This could also explain the bad mood her cat appears to be in. She then proceeded to say, “We have a trash talk thread now, gal, why wouldn’t you just do your thing up in there?” And there we have it... Before I have even issued my 1st edition I have already been thrown in the trash by Kuini and been emasculated. What a lovely woman. In honour of her, I shall pretend to interview her each week, until she gives me something to work with.




Owenlethbridge

1. What is the origin of the name "Twisted Souls", is there a cool story behind it?

I was at home and needed a name for the alliance I was going to start and I was trying to think of a name so I looked at my shirt and was wearing a `twisted souls branded` jumper and I thought to myself I like that

2. Who are the worthiest adversaries for your alliance right now?

All I trust them all

3. How old do you need to be to be considered to die of old age?

As old as your heart will let you

4. Why do you play grepolis?

Annoy People and have fun I guess

5. Will Twisted Souls (should plans go accordingly) be around for WW's?

Cant see why not :)

Things to take away:

1. Owen trusts his adversaries. I’m neither sure that this is a wise move, nor as to whether he gathered the purpose of the question.

2. Owen is quite the romantic. The heart is key to Owen, so make sure during diplomacy to send him a box of chocolates.

3. Owen isn’t entirely sure why he plays grepolis, but it appears he mostly takes joy in the removal of joy from others. OwenlethHades?

4. Owen likes Twisted Soul as a brand. Not relevant, just thought I’d note it.



Miniboo

1. Noted in the external forums, HunKiller recently handed off 4 cities to BeenBroke, a member of the Priory. Does this read anything into the relations of the two alliances?

Not really but Hunkiller and Been Broke have a relationship in real life so im not surprised by this move.

2. It is rumoured that the daily number of times that we have to pray to our lord Miniboo is set to go up from 3 times a day to 5 times a day. Is this true?


That’s true... I set my clock on it and while im praying im also putting some troops in the queue


3. Besides your own, which alliance leadership do you respect the most in this world and why?


I respects boom boom boom as a leader. Since he declared as the first person war on us :D

Miniboo on 2018-02-21 at 14:42
So when those attacks start...im waiting a long time already....send all attacks to me!!
Boom boom boom on 2018-02-14 at 01:51
Hello, I am the war commander for my alliance The Machine and we have decided to declare war on your alliance as we feel you are not as strong as the rankings would suggest. We wish you the best of luck because you will need it, prepare to die.
From the council of The Machine
4. How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?


No Answer


5. If you were to make a prediction, which alliance in the top 10 do you think will fall first and why?


We have SlivasLegendZ ....so we won’t make it till the end


Things to take away:


1. Hunkiller most likely sacrificed himself selflessly to help out his one true love BeenBroke. The two were together at the start of the world and have clearly been holding hands in and outside the game… Which I am very offended by.

2. Miniboo is a demanding god.

3. Mini respects players who declare war on the alliance, even if those players are idiots…

4. Mini does not know how much wood a wood chuck could chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood.

5. I am disliked by my leader.

Daniel The Great II


1. Where did the name "The Priory" come from?

One of our other leaders came up with this name, he may of been referring to the priory of sion

2. Besides your own, which leadership do you respect the most in this world and why?

Twisted Souls, they did not get to number one spot for nothing and look to have a solid leadership there.


3. If a tree falls in a forest and there is no one there to hear it does it make a sound?

Sound is sound and doesn't rely on people to interpret it.


4. Why do you play grepolis?

Mainly for something to do and of course the social aspect, it is an nice feeling when you conquer a city as a team.


5. Are The Priory planning on staying around for WW should they get that far?

Maybe, you will have to wait to find out


Things to take away:

1. Daniel is a diplomat in who he chooses to compliment…

2. He understands sound better than I

3. … He is such a straight shooter I have ran out of things to say

jameslongst

1. Where did the name "True Fear" come from?

I played Risk one night till three in the morning, drank a Guinness extra stout, and ate a spicy Italian sausage with brown mustard. Then I had a grepolis fever dream, and I woke up screaming "True Fear!"

2. Which leadership, besides your own, do you respect the most in the world and why?

There are other leaders besides us? I hadn't noticed.

3. Will your answer to this question be no?

I try to say yes to life.

4. Why do you play grepolis?

Firstly, my wife lets me. Secondly, my co founder keeps me going.

5. Are True Fear planning on staying around for WW should they get that far?

Only if we feel like it.

Things to take away:

1. He is probably mentally scarred from that night
2. James is not very observant.
3. *whip noise*
4. James is a yes man, what a good attitude to have. Might ask for one of his cities?

Anon - Conducted by MelanieMurder

Now this, is ancient gold dust. I can bring exclusively an interview conducted by Melanie herself before she departed from the world. Unfortunately, the player does not wish to be named, but I am happy to make fun of Mr. Anonymous all the same.

1. What can you tell us about your Alliance White Snake? e.g How you came about? What are your goals/intentions? Any further perishable information?


Alliance WS is the sister of True Fear (TF), its pretty much like a "teaching alliance", where you can find several guides, you are also in constant surveillance, meaning, you are not worthy (yet) for TF.

Without knowing anyone, the best alliance in the Oc45 (world?) was TF, just applied, and that’s all.

I got no goals or intentions, I come to NET to play with more players and to be honest i'm disappointed so far, several players playing farmville... This is a war game, we don't need builders, well Domination is coming. I also don't care about the wonders, never did, in the moment the game dies, I leave and start another.


2. How's the current situation in your Ocean from you and your alliances perspective? e.g ongoing conflicts, gossip etc in your ocean


So far there's no major conflict going down in 45, WS/TF is growing in the border with 45/55. (Wolfs don't count and BENNU CULT got hammered).


3. What are your views on the ongoing war between The Shady Bunch vs Twisted Souls & The Priory?

Honestly, I think The Shady Bunch is the best alliance in the world, and for that reason 2 of the other 3 major alliance are going on them. The Priory out of the 4, is the one that got the best evolution if I'm not mistaken, I would never say that The Priory would swim so nice. Hurray to them.

4. Which alliance do you see winning this world and why?

The Priory for me, WS/TF will never go on them (as it seems), Twisted team up with them to destroy The Shady Bunch, and then they can crush the rest.

5. Any further comments? e.g anything you feel is worth exposing to the public eye that doesn't meet the previous questions.

TIP: - Check the growing TS/WF cities in the Oc55, and ask yourself why.


I think we can take a few things away from this interview:

1. This White Snake player has a poster of princess Kuini on their wall.

2. Said player tried to double cross Kuini by complementing the Priory in the hope that Mel would be swooned as part of the alliance. (Never double cross Kuini).

3. As a White Snake player he/she is embarrassingly not good enough for True Fear, and if you are currently in White Snake, your alliance member just called you all noobs.

4. Said player would like to identify the plan of TF/WS just in case you missed it and therefore destroy all chance of surprise.



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 
Last edited:

SlivasLegendZ

Phrourach
4. The Reports
Now this section will just have to be filled next time, my IGN is exactly the same as it is here on the externals so please PM me any reports that are particularly funny or epic and I will screenshot them into the next edition. I will pick my favourite 5 for each edition


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


5. The Education Section
Now I imagine this is where most of you are going to stop reading. But for those of you who care, there is a lot in our modern-day language that originates from Greek mythology. Today, we shall talk just about the world itself, Epidamnos.
You may be interested to know that were you to travel to modern day Epidamnos you would end up in Albania. Although originally founded by the Greeks in 627 BC, the city would be of much greater importance to the Romans and Byzantines that would come later. The city was originally run as a tight oligarchy in which there was a ruling magistrate. During the middle ages, the Bulgarians, Venetians and Ottomans would all lay claim to the city.
Today, the modern-day city Durrës sits where Epidamnos once stood. I say once stood because the whole city was levelled by an earthquake in 345 AD and rebuilt under Roman rule. Should you now ever feel the need to visit the city its main attraction is the Amphitheatre of Durrës which has a capacity of 20,000, making it the largest Amphitheatre in the Balkan Peninsula. Although, I suspect you will be a bit unimpressed by what you find…





A short introduction today just to get the ball rolling. Next week I will be talking about some of the gods. Greek mythology is extremely interesting and vast... Did you know Zeus castrated his own father and banished him to the depths of Tartarus? Find out about this and more in next weeks issue.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Closing Note:

I hope you have enjoyed today's issue. I will aim to release my next issue on Sunday 4th March, and then continue to release either weekly, or bi-weekly depending on popularity, time and actual goings-on. Please give me feedback in the comments section and let me know what you would like to see in next weeks issue! And don't forget to PM me those reports, thanks for reading.

And whilst you wait, enjoy BeenBroke's response to boom boom boom.
Уважаемый boom boom boob,
Я хотел бы извиниться за любые преступления, которые я или мои товарищи по альянсу совершили против вас.
Как вы только что сказали, мы не способны к бойцам, окутывая путь к вершине. После покупки так много от использования кредитных карт нашего родителя,
это было бы огромным позором, чтобы быть оправленным, хотя было бы огромной честью быть оправленным кучкой бойцов и интеллектуалов
таких как вы сами. Пожалуйста, прошу вас, оставить мой альянс, взять ваши ядерные принадлежности в другом месте, и за это мы готовы заплатить вам
ежедневную дань по вашему выбору. Мы хорошо знаем о большой угрозе, которую вы отправляете нам, и за это я прошу вас пересмотреть.
В конце концов, это не такая жестокая игра, как farmville, это игра для великих умов, таких как Логан и Джейк Пол. Если вы действительно решите пересмотреть,
я и мой союз будут навсегда в вашем долге.
Искренне Ваш,
BeenBroke

 
Last edited:

Ylyssia

Hipparchus
miniboo the god worships 6 other gods- nice bit of godception there

a quality read, look forward to the next one
 

Edwardicus III

Strategos
Wish I could say I was offended by you saying that you don't know us (the leadership of Kraken)... but then I realized, we have done nothing to be known o_O
 

jameslongst

Strategos
Very well done, Had me literally laughing out loud, No mention of Twisted Souls having a sister, I am sure you will entwine them in your next issue. Great stuff.

Side note: Make the chap passing wind stand somewhere else
If he mentioned TSs sister, he would have to put the score far in TFs advantage. Cant have that.

Sounds bitter. In fact, I think this was a bunch of b.s. propaganda, not a real take on this server. Leave me off your mailing list in the future.
 

kranthitejab

Phrourach
Well when they were Timber wolves they were food for everyone. The last city Twisted Minds lost to True fear is on 19th and I am positive they werent allied during that time so I dont see a reason to add them with Twisted Souls
 

MahimCFC

Hipparchus
If he mentioned TSs sister, he would have to put the score far in TFs advantage. Cant have that.

Sounds bitter. In fact, I think this was a bunch of b.s. propaganda, not a real take on this server. Leave me off your mailing list in the future.
Come on now James I'm sure you appreciate a good bit of banter.
 

Threcker

Guest
Speaking for White Snake I can tell you there will be no merger name. Mergers are apart of Grepo whether its a diplomatic choice, a true academy or just a means to an end they happen. But merging names just doesnt ever need to happen and I can guarantee that True Snakes, White with Fear or any other combination won't be happening. Merger alliance names, might as well just start merging words, its all Fupid....see what i did there

edit: good read tho i liked that :)
 

SlivasLegendZ

Phrourach
If he mentioned TSs sister, he would have to put the score far in TFs advantage. Cant have that.

Sounds bitter. In fact, I think this was a bunch of b.s. propaganda, not a real take on this server. Leave me off your mailing list in the future.
I'm sorry you feel this way! In my defence, the creation of the sister alliance Twisted Minds happened after I had written the section on wars. I released the paper yesterday with possibly the worst hangover I have had in some time so it slipped my mind. I will be sure to mention them in the next issue!

Although on the flipside James, if you are going to claim that taking timber wolves cities (because that is who they were before they were Twisted Minds) is the same as taking a Twisted Souls city then you are as bias as I have appeared to be. We (The Priory) were also taking timber wolves cities at will but you won't hear us claiming we are winning a war against TS.

Hopefully, you can give me another chance when I come knocking and if not, my prediction of finding out who has the thickest skin (or in this case the thinnest) came true quicker than expected!
 

princess Kuini

Phrourach
Although on the flipside James, if you are going to claim that taking timber wolves cities (because that is who they were before they were Twisted Minds)
"Wolves, tipplers" wonder who else, "Who Cares", We all know ts and priory will hug anything that breathes to fight this server out, if that means Priory needs 4 naps/pacts then 4 naps/pacts it is, and if TS needs sisters and 4 naps/pacts then that too is what they will do.. Unfortunately this is what Grepolis has resorted to.
 

owenlethbridge

Phrourach
"Wolves, tipplers" wonder who else, "Who Cares", We all know ts and priory will hug anything that breathes to fight this server out, if that means Priory needs 4 naps/pacts then 4 naps/pacts it is, and if TS needs sisters and 4 naps/pacts then that too is what they will do.. Unfortunately this is what Grepolis has resorted to.
how are we hugging ?? you make no sense (most overall abp and dbp in server and yet we are hugging) you need to think before you speak . (And before you say anything about bp boosts everyone has them not just us it just happens to be half of our enemies disbanded after one op)
 

princess Kuini

Phrourach
how are we hugging ?? you make no sense (most overall abp and dbp in server and yet we are hugging) you need to think before you speak . (And before you say anything about bp boosts everyone has them not just us it just happens to be half of our enemies disbanded after one op)
haha, never do I chuck at bp boosts, everyone uses them thats after all what they are there for.. Are you saying you havent pacted/napped with many? I was asked if Shadies wanted to pact Wolves too, also told by wolves that you had pacted but wouldnt share forum but certainly pacted with them, (while your counter parts fought them), perfect way to get them to submit to being someones sister, then I also was told you offered pacts with other alliances so long as they fought Shadies, so before you speak again, "check yourself" and all you have spoken to.. One thing you will learn Owen, is Shadies always tell it how it is..
 

owenlethbridge

Phrourach
ermm i would like to see who you spoke to because the only alliance we ever made a agreement wit was with priory (we was nap with wolves at start of server didnt last long had them red untill we arrange this sister thing )(maybe a discussion in our council but never reached out to any alliances except priory) one thing i learnt is shadies tell it how they want people to believe it

We have 2 pacts thats all wouldn't class that as many
 
Last edited: