On the lighter side :)

DeletedUser

Guest
Seems like Omicron forum activity has lessened so i will post some jokes to make it active again :) Maybe funny to some may be offensive to other but defiantly funny :p

All jokes related to Omicron world only!!!!
 

DeletedUser

Guest
Malicious-SadTroll.png
Not getting enough DBP????

Simple solution!!
Malicious-Troll.png


Send angry mails to enemy alliance leaders and watch all the incoming attacks on your city
Malicious-DevilTroll.png


Sit back and enjoy the noobish attacks on you!!
Laughing-LOL.png


You Mad Enemy???
Malicious-Trollpeeking.png
 

DeletedUser

Guest
Determined-FuManchu.png
Me waiting to time my attacks!!!

Malicious-TrollHot.png
Wife Distracts you for a moment!!!

Rage-RageClassic.png
You miss the timing of your attack!!!!

Miscellaneous-TrueStory.png
True Story!!!
 

DeletedUser

Guest
Intelligence

It was a warm summers day when suddenly Alpha spotters saw an in coming Evo attack. They quickly alerted their leaders who at once began to prepare, Neils sent for Evic and Zodd. When Harry and Lloyd (or I mean Zodd and Evic) found him, he was basking in the sunshine. Neils told his troops to dig a trench to prepare for the massacrer which was by now well on its way. They grabbed their shovels and began digging, when they reached half way Zodd asked to Evic "why are we digging this hole while neils relaxes in the sun?". "I don't know" replied Evic "I'll ask him", so he climbed out of the hole and walked to Neils.

"Why is it that we have to dig a hole while you relax in the sun?" he asked. "Intelligence" replied Neils, Evic looked confused and asked "what's intelligence?" Neils replied "I'll show you". He placed his hand on a tree and told Evic to hit it as hard as he could, Evic took a mighty swing and just as he was about to hit him Neils moved his hand. Evic hit the tree with full force and almost broke his hand, Neils laughed and said "that's intelligence".

Evic returned to the trench and Zodd inquired as to what had been said, Evic explained that they were digging the whole because of intelligence. "What's intelligence" asked Zodd, "I'll show you" replied Evic. He looked around but could not see no tree on which to place his hand, not one to let things like that slow him down he places his upon his face and says "now grab your shovel and swing as hard as you can at my hand".
 

DeletedUser

Guest
LOL, nice to see a little break in the harsh banter. Some funny stuff here.

Wife: Why aren't you coming to bed.

Me: I'm at war dear, I'm at war.
 

DeletedUser

Guest
Haha, Niels is pretty smart… I have to give credit where credit is due. I’ve spent the last couple of days combing the net, hanging out in bars, and asking friends for funny jokes to respond to this one, but I’ve come up empty handed… none made me laugh like this one did. You sir have delivered a knockout blow and won the round lol, but be warned that I will only fight stronger after I get up.
In any case here’s my contribution…

It was the first day of Grade Three in a new town for bodnapa. As a test, his teacher went around the room and asked each of the students to count to 50. Some did very well, counting as high as 30 or 40 with just a few mistakes. Others couldn't get past 20. bodnapa, however, did extremely well; he counted past 50, right up to 100 without any mistakes. He was so excited that he ran home and told his Papa bcae how well he had done. bcae nodded and told him, "That's because you are in Evolution, son." The next day, in language class, the teacher asked the students to recite the alphabet. It's Grade Three, so most could make it half way through without much trouble. Some made it to S or T, but bodnapa rattled off the alphabet perfectly right to the end. That evening, bodnapa once again bragged to his Papa bcae about his prowess in his new school. bcae, knowingly, explained to him, "That's because you are in Evolution, son." The next day, after Physical Education, the boys were taking showers. bodnapa noted that, compared to the other boys in his grade, he seemed overly "well endowed". This confused him. That night he told his Papa bcae. "Poppa, they all have little tiny ones, but mine is ten times bigger than theirs. Is that because I'm in Evolution?" he asked. "No, son," explained his Papa bcae, "That's because you're 18."
 

DeletedUser

Guest
Funny stuff Eviciouz...will use that on many of my friends...lol
 

DeletedUser

Guest
I couldn't think of any joke thanks to Mr. cb. So instead I made a song for him:

~you are my cb. my only cb. you make me happy when bps are scarce. I know you want some, but you can't just get some. without losing more troops than me~
 

DeletedUser

Guest
Good one Evic, here's a story I once heard,

3 Alpha players were trying to cross the ocean, to get to an enemy city here is what happened.
The first, (now know as amir, lol) decided he would swim across and show his strength, but half way he drowned.
The Second, Spiller, decided he would sail across, but once he got out there he realized he forgot is sails and he's still out there somewhere.
The Third, Evic, made it, and when he got here my soldiers asked how did you finally get here, and Evic said.
Me Alpha, me no dumb, me stick rocket up my bumb. Moral of story, Evic is the best at sticking things in his butt.
 

DeletedUser

Guest
that is especially funny since I am a varsity swimmer at my school ant the best at the 500 free. Turns out few people would be able to swim there at all.
 

DeletedUser

Guest
Ha... Ha... Hah..... very funny there guy. I admit to having many talents but I wasn't aware of that one... BUT... That was hilarious too, on many levels. The joke itself was eh, but I could picture the expression required to deliver the final line. And the fact that you can dish it out means that I won't feel bad when I retaliate :D On that note, let's continue with the fun!

Two women friends, Murtius and TGI, had gone out for a Girls Night Out, and had been decidedly over-enthusiastic on the cocktails. Incredibly drunk and walking home they suddenly realized they both needed to pee. They were very near a graveyard and Murtius suggested they do their business behind a headstone or something. TGI had nothing to wipe with so she took off her panties, used them and threw them away. Murtius however was wearing an expensive underwear set and didn't want to ruin hers, but was lucky enough to salvage a large ribbon from a wreath that was on a grave and proceeded to wipe herself with it. After finishing, they made their way home.

The next day TGI's husband phones Murt's husband and said, "These damn girl's nights out have got to stop. TGI came home last night without her panties."

"That's nothing," said Murt's husband. "Murtius came back with a sympathy card stuck between the cheeks of her butt that said, 'From all of us at the Fire Station, We'll never forget you!'"

I didn't forget about you Murto :)
 

DeletedUser

Guest
Haha yeah and before my demise here's one for my new buddy bcae...

Once upon a time there lived a man named bcae who had a maddening passion for baked beans. He loved them but unfortunately they had always had a very embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction to him. Then one day he met a girl and fell in love. When it became apparent that they would marry he thought to himself, "She is so sweet and proper, she would never go for this carrying on." So he made the supreme sacrifice, and gave up the beans.

Some months later, his car broke down on the way home from work. Since he lived in the country he called his wife and told her that he would be late because he had to walk home. On his way he passed a small diner and the odor of the baked beans was more than he could stand. Since he still had miles to walk, he figured that he would walk off any ill effects by the time he reached home. So, he stopped at the diner and before he knew it, he had consumed three large orders of baked beans.

All the way home he putt-putted. And upon arriving home he felt reasonably sure he could control it. His wife seemed excited to see him and exclaimed delightedly, "Darling, I have a surprise for dinner tonight." She then blindfolded him and led him to his chair at the table. He seated himself and just as she was about to remove the blindfold from bcae, the telephone rang. She made him promise not to touch the blindfold until she returned. She then went to answer the phone.

The baked beans bcae had consumed were still affecting him and the pressure was becoming almost unbearable, so while his wife was out of the room he seized the opportunity, shifted his weight to one leg and let it go. It was not only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck running over a skunk in front of pulpwood mill. He took his napkin and fanned the air around him vigorously. Then, he shifted to the other cheek and ripped three more, which reminded him of cooked cabbage. Keeping his ears tuned to the conversation in the other room, he went on like this for another ten minutes. When the phone farewells signaled the end of his freedom, he fanned the air a few more times with his napkin, placed it on his lap and folded his hands upon it, smiling contentedly to himself. He was the picture of innocence when his wife returned, apologizing for taking so long, she asked him if he peeked, and he assured her that he had not.

At this point, she removed the blindfold, and bcae was surprised!! There were twelve dinner guests seated around the table to wish him a "Happy Birthday"!!!
 

DeletedUser

Guest
Evic's empire is so broke at Christmas he'll have to cut wholes in his pockets if he wants to get something to play with, I mean the guy is so broke I saw him outside KFC licking somebody else's fingers. He can't afford to pay attention, I went over to his city the other day and when I rang the doorbell he shouted ding dong out the window. When I walked through the front door I ended up in the back yard, as I walked in I saw he was drawing on a etch-a-sketch when I asked "what are you doing?" he replied "I'm watching TV". Later I stepped on a lighting cigarette butt on the ground and his workers asked who turned the heating off? As we walked down the street a beggar walked up and handed him money, as we walked a long I noticed he only had 1 shoe and I said "bro you lost a shoe" and he replied "no I found one". He can't afford to even give his 2 cents in a conversation. I guess you guys know the story of the old lady who lived in a shoe? Evic is so poor his old lady lives in a flip flop, the man is so poor when we got home he discovered somebody had broken in and left him money. When I asked what was for dinner he put his foot up on the table and said "corn" :)
 

DeletedUser

Guest
Once upon a time there was a man named Eviciouz.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
He was so lonely that he died. End of Story!!!
 

DeletedUser

Guest
Come on now Evic is not that bad, Lets list his good traits.. thinking.. .. .. thinking harder.. .. .. ........ Owww.
yep I got nothing, lol. (it's all good though)
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top